The Land of Bricks and Nasi Lemak

Lego. Who doesn't know what Lego is?

Legoland Malaysia opened it's doors to Asia and the world early this year. And we were lucky enough to have been able to book a trip with everyone's busy schedule. At the very least, our short holiday included one full day to spend at Legoland, and lounge around the days before and after.

We went to Johor Bahru, Malaysia with little knowledge on how to go about our trip. All we knew was the name of our hotel and where we were going, Legoland. Nothing new, we were in the same situation as we were when we went to Penang earlier this year. It's good to get lost. Trains, bus rides, long queues, immigration and four kids. No problem.

We went on this trip with Jakjak's cousins; the twins and a ruckus. The first thing you notice is how burning hot it is. You could probably cook an egg on the pavement, no kidding. I had Jakjak and the twins cool off in the ATM booth while waiting for our tickets. I had high hopes that the kids would enjoy the park, but with the sun against us, not so much for the parents.

Legoland differs itself from other theme parks with it's, well, theme. Which is, half of the park is made up of Lego bricks. At it's core, it is still a theme park with rides and attractions designed to entertain anyone from 3 years onward. While some of the more extreme rides like roller coasters exist in the park, you can't help but think that the place was designed more with children in mind. Not surprising, Lego is a learning toy, and is considered for kids. You do appreciate the uniqueness of the Lego-themed rides and attractions, based on Lego's diverse line of bricks (when I was a kid, a Lego brick was a Lego brick). From the basic Duplo all the way to Technic, the areas were designed to mimic the general feel for who these types of Legos were made for. That being said, Lego has tons of products and you can't expect them all to be in front of you. Duplo made up the babies area of the park where parents can (supposedly) drop off the kids and get a sitter to look after them while they stroll in the park. Technic hosted an intriguing coaster that was shot up per car. Academy had Lego building classes that you can get your kids to take a part in (gladly would as it's in an airconditioned building!).

The park itself is not really that big. You can probably get the Legoland experience in one day. Of course, that's taking into account that you don't need to go on each ride and attraction. The queues on the main rides can take up to an hour, and there are classes for kids that are scheduled with fixed intervals. One ride per area can get you through the park. Mini-land may take a little longer if you like to stare at the details. It was a mixed experience as we went there twice, first in the scorching heat and second as the sun was going down and the lights on the building were being turned on. I would suggest leaving it for winding down. Apart from the day being a bit cooler, you would end up in getting the evening view where the lights start to open up on the buildings and streets of the Lilliputian metropolis that it represents. 

It's a brilliant concept. One that kids would enjoy. If only the place had more trees ...

The Life of a Stage Parent

We were all very excited when we learned that Jakjak had been chosen as the OshKosh B'gosh ambassador a few weeks ago. He beat over a hundred other tots for the title (according to the newspaper). What was cool was that he did it, like a boss. :)

Thursday night. We have spoken to Jakjak about the fashion show the following day. We told him what he should expect, what not to expect and how he had an obligation (sort of) to do it (being the winner of the contest). At that point, we had realized that we had indeed become stage parents. Sigh.

Call time for practice was at 7 in the morning. Tough. On a non-school day, we are all still asleep at that hour. Add to that about an hour's worth of travel to get to Paragon and it was a recipe for a moody morning. Surprisingly, we made it to Paragon in one piece. We were hungry (too early to make breakfast) but not frustratingly mad. In fact, everything was calm and serene that morning. At least until the practice got on its way. And it all ended in a high note where everyone was free to do anything until the 2 PM call time for hair and makeup. For us, we went home.

In the afternoon, the mood had changed. Jakjak did not want to be on the show (that's what he thought anyway). He started acting up all through hair and make up. Thankfully, mum managed to calm him down after a while (after a long while). And with only minutes left before the show, he was finally up and about and playing with the other kids as if nothing happened. Mum decided that she would be the one to stay backstage with Jakjak, which meant I had front stage duties. It was more difficult than I had expected. I didn't think there would be so many people. I decided on photos rather than video (which I think now was a bad idea), because I was thinking that we can get a copy of it from Kidstyle. But it was alright, it wasn't easy to get good shots (the official photographers had the best location after all), but I managed somehow.

The shots could have been better, probably if I had training shooting events. But all went well. The show was over. Jakjak surprised everyone, even us. He was totally in to it. He ramped up the catwalk like he owned it. And it was the first time he did it. We are so proud of him for being a star in his own world. We hope that he did OshKosh (and Jay Gee) proud.

These two photos courtesy of Jules Estrella. Thanks Bro!

Ambassador Duty

Mum and dad saw an ad in the paper that OshKosh B'gosh was holding a model ambassador search for the brand. We both looked at Jakjak and smiled (more of an evil grin actually). While we had to buy our entry to the contest (you had to purchase a certain amount worth of OshKosh products), we figured it was just fair. Jakjak needed new shoes anyway (or so we kept telling ourselves), and that alone was already more than half of the required purchase. So we got him the shoes and told him all about the contest. There was a little bit of hesitation between the 3 of us then, but we thought, what the hell, let's just do it anyway.

We have always believed that Jakjak was photogenic. But since we are his parents, we thought that was just natural. I mean, no parent would dare say that their child isn't cute or adorable, right? So we have always just kept that between ourselves. While on the topic of photography, it's also best that people know how shy Jakjak is in front of the camera. Or so he says. What he always tells people, is not always what he is. To be honest, he is far from being shy. Well, at least not too shy to be a charming little prince.

What followed next were a few photo-shoots  After all, we did have to prepare him for modelling duty if needed. A few good shots here, a few good shots there, and more hours of frustration than was required and we finally had something to send to the contest coordinators. It's not that he was difficult to shoot, in fact, most of the time he was in the mood to do the shoots. It was just, well, we never really had modelling experience. Both the model and the photographer. So sometimes it was awkward, and sometimes it was hopeless. Most of the time it was just full of fun and silly things. And that was how it went on most days. And all that labor of love brought us to the interview and screening day.

On hindsight, we did not really get Jakjak ready for any interview. We just told him that there would be one. That they would probably ask him about himself, and that if they did, he can tell them anything he wants to tell them. We knew that he would have to model his clothes and told him to just follow instructions from whoever was coordinating the shoot. We did not tell him what to say, we did not teach him how to pose (goodness, we probably should have). We just let him do whatever he feels like doing and have fun doing it. It looked like he did have fun while we were there. Too much fun probably as he was in a most cheerful mood all day. So we figured, he did good. He did very good, that he received a round of applause from the crowd. After that, was the excruciating wait for the results.

Responsibility. Too Much, Too Soon ?

Jakjak had a scheduled learning journey with his class to the Botanical Gardens. On his school journal, it said to bring a hat, insect repellent and a camera. That last bit got me, for real. These are 6-7 year old kids who don't pay much attention to their belongings, and they want them to be bringing cameras. Cameras come in a load of different flavors now, but you still can't call them cheap (affordable, yes, but not cheap). I was having second thoughts of letting Jakjak bring one, I know him. One minute he is holding on to something and the next minute he does not even know he had had it. But at the same time, I did want to see if he had grown responsible enough to be entrusted with such a thing.

Well, I got to test it anyway when Jakjak asked for permission to bring his camera on their trip. We did get him one that was shock proof, dust proof and water proof (just to be on the safe side). And it wasn't cheap (affordable, yes). Since he asked nicely, I gave him a chance. I attached a neck strap to the camera (replacing the wrist strap) so that it would be easier for him to lug around. I spoke to him about his responsibility to take care of the camera. That he should make sure that it does not get lost or get snagged by giant spiders. And he was quite sincere and honest that he would do all that as well. So we taped his name, address and our contact number on all sides of the camera just to be on the safe side. And we let him bring it.

One hour into the trip, mum asked one of the parent volunteers to take pictures of Jakjak and the trip. Her friend then informed mum that Jakjak did not have a camera, and when asked, he said he must have misplaced it. Ouch! I wasn't really angry, after all, I did let him bring the camera (thinking that he would be responsible enough now for it). Well, it became a costly lesson for me (and him, hopefully). I was still hopeful that he left it someplace where people would find it and return it to him (like the bus), or maybe back in school. I was thinking about it all through the day until finally, one of the parent volunteers told mum that the camera was found in school! Somehow, he left it at his desk and his form teacher found it. Sigh!

Care Bear

I got a boo-boo in my hand. Somehow, I accidentally cut my finger with a razor (yes, it's pretty lame). And of course, it bled. Jakjak saw this and was immediately by my side looking over the boo-boo. In the blink of an eye, he was dragging a chair to the bedroom. He was soon up on it and inside the closet. He reached out and grabbed our first aid kit, opened it up and took a plaster from it. He told me to wash my hands and before you can say ouchie, he was putting the plaster on the boo-boo. One can't help but smile over something so simplistic and yet so meaningful. For him, he was helping out in a way that he knew how (by watching mum tend to his own boo-boo). To me, he was showing how much he has grown and how responsible he is towards people.

Maybe it's a one-time thing for now, or maybe it's not. After all, he had always had a kind demeanor. He looks after his peers like a big brother. And that is one of his most noticeable traits (next to being so talkative at least). He truly is one of a kind, and he has done a lot of things that make us proud.

A child copying what his parents are doing is one thing, and a child genuinely showing compassion is another. As parents, we may overlook this, but if we forget for a moment that he is our child, one will notice that all of it is real. That he is not simply copying what you have been doing, but he had learned why you are doing it and is actually emphatic about it all. Once you realize this, you can smile and rest on the fact that he is growing up as a fine child indeed.

Meeting Mister Maker

Mister Maker is the host of his self-titled show on Ceebeebies, a kid channel under BBC News. It's not really an entirely new concept in children shows. I have watched art shows on the telly when I was younger myself. What was great now was, that we had an opportunity to meet Mister Maker. 

Mum had entered a contest on Facebook to get an invitation to meet Mister Maker. It took 2 weeks before we got a reply and it was quite frustrating. Not because it took that long, but because Jakjak told us that he did not want to meet Mister Maker. He said he was shy (just like what he tells us about everything). He was really reluctant to go, to the point that we had to actually argue about it. But mum wasn't about to let that invitation go to waste. So that morning, we went to Plaza Singapura to meet Mister Maker.

When he was seated, he still clung to his mum like he was the shy-est 6 year old there. Soon enough, some other kids shared his table with him. The good thing was that the kids that he got to share the table with were English speakers and were as talkative as he was. The siblings were then joined by one more "shy" kid. While they were starting to get cozy with each other, the parents were then asked to move out of the activity area as the show was about to start (and as one would have hoped, he was already his normal not-so-shy self at that time).

The activity was not that long, as time was short. But it felt like what a Mister Maker making area should feel like. Mister Maker himself was spot on as to how he is on the telly, which probably means that is how he really is. I guess what followed next was what the parents had been waiting for, a photo session with Mister Maker. Proof that their child had actually met Mister Maker. And even through the long sessions, Mister Maker had been jolly and  cheerful like how he is on the telly. He was absolutely brilliant. I wouldn't really mind meeting him again.

That Big Head

Boys will be boys. So the saying goes.

And what is it that boys actually do? Let's see if I can remember as much as I think I can.

Back in the Philippines, we had an electric fan. A small desk fan with plastic blades and rather standard sized grills. Jakjak was just a year and a half old (I'm guessing here). While the fan was dwindling down after being turned off, he stuck his finger in. It rattled a bit and we only saw his arm retracting back to where it had been previously. "Ouch", he said.

There was this time that we were sitting patiently at Food Republic in Suntec while looking around waiting for a seat. Jakjak was just a little more than 3 years old, and he was sat beside a candelabra lit with a standard incandescent bulb. Curious, he touched the bulb and all we heard after that was a swoosh. His hand flew out of the candelabra faster than how it went in, and then a small squeal, "ouch", he said.

When he was 5 years old, he had a Valkyrie. That's a Robotech toy, a jet that can transform into a walker and then a robot. It was one of those Japanese culture unique super deformed toys. This one, however, had tires that could be removed (but shouldn't). One day, there was supposed to be 2 tires, but there was only 1. When we asked him where it was, he said he put it in his nose. We did not want to believe that he would do that to himself (we taught him better - or so we thought). Since mum did not want to take chances, she brought him to the doctor. But the local doctor was not fit to remove the tire from his tiny nostril, so he had to be sent to a specialist children's hospital. True enough, they plucked the tire out of his nose (after knocking him out with some sleeping gas).

Recently, he had been in and out and down and under the shelves at a shop in the mall. He always does this, to hide inside the clothes hanging on the racks so we paid him no mind. He soon stuck his head between two rails holding the shelf up. "Mum, I'm stuck". When we found him, his head was under the shelf with his body dangling out from the opposite side. "Mum, I'm stuck. Really!". And as we tried plucking him out, we found out that his big head was indeed stuck between the rails. While trying to get him out, we caught the attention of a couple who were probably thinking "what in the world are those three blokes doing?". A few nudges and pulls later, we decided to do it the other way around and push him in further. Luckily, his body was small enough to fit further in and he managed to get on the shelf and slide out from the side of it.

Oh yes, the things that little boys do.

First Day At Hogwarts

Coming from a fresh start of the day, Jakjak had been in a jolly good mood since morning. He did not want to go to the Harry Potter : The Exhibition when it first came out because he said he was scared (admittedly, the Deathly Hallows wasn't the best movie to take a 6 yo kid to). However, he seemed to be in a very good mood and immediately said "yes" when we told him that we wanted to go to the Harry Potter exhibit.

Unlike mum and dad though, he only had rudimentary knowledge of the HP universe, that is from the few movies that he has seen. Mum and dad had read all seven books (and then some) and have been fans of the series. The books had always has a special place in our hearts, and we are waiting for Jakjak to grow up old enough for reading the Harry Potter books (right now, he has graduated from Dr. Seuss to Geronimo Stilton books).

While he was being sorted though, he had already fallen into the HP trance. He was talking and telling stories to the host about what he knows in the HP world. Most notably, the dragon from year 4 (The Goblet of Fire) and how he used his broomstick to outwit the Hungarian Horntailed Dragon (which was inside the exhibit as well). 

"Better be, Gryffindor!"

That was how our journey began. Of course, it wouldn't be complete without seeing the Hogwarts Express in all it's glory. The portraits adorning the Gryffindor House were also there and you can't really miss the singing lady. Bits and pieces of every character were scattered across the room. It was arranged in a not-so-chronological order with odd pieces showing up with groups from a different book, but you really wouldn't mind. Hagrid's hut is a place that invites you into the world beyond the castle, and it feels as though you are there, with Hagrid's massive costume looking down on you. Let's not forget about wands and broomsticks. The Nimbus 2000 and 2001 make their appearances. The Elder wand loomed ominously in one corner as well as dragon eggs, imps, elves and dragons (well, dragon heads anyway). You also have giant Acromantula spiders, Centaurs and the Hippogriff Buckbeak that made it's appearance in The Prisoner Of Azkaban.

Props and artifacts were there. Jakjak immediately recognized the Golden Snitch and the Nimbus 2000. The Elf, Dobby was also there hanging around with the costumes used by the actors in the movie. The wardrobe, the feast in the great hall and a Dementor even showed up (which of course sent Jakjak under my arm being "scared" of it). 

The tour ended with the shop. And what a wonderful shop it was. It felt like Diagon Alley. You can buy wands, and scarves, and beanies from all the house colors. There are chocolate frogs complete with collectible Wizard cards and of course, every-flavored beans. There are tons of memorabilia available. Some with sky-high prices (that is to be expected) and some that are reasonable enough. This is the reason why, we ended up with a Nimbus 2000 for Jakjak. 

(Dad's) First Day In School

I had to take leave from work for "Meet The Parents" day in school so that I could meet Jakjak's form teacher. But since I had time to kill, mum thought it would be cool to do some volunteer work in school as well. So I did. It's not anything major, the volunteer thing. In fact, to me, it was not much more than looking over some kids (about a hundred or so kids). Being P1 kids though, you can expect them to be a rowdy bunch. They were loud, busy and all over the place. I was on canteen duty. The kids don't really need much in terms of outright help, I guess this is because kids are actually being trained to be independent in school. I helped to open a bag of chips. That was it. But the school teachers felt otherwise. Since I was new, the teachers who saw me smiled and said "thank you for helping out". It felt good to be appreciated for the little things. In fact, I have not felt more appreciated for helping out at school than in any other place.

During that short while, I was able to see Jakjak and his friends. I was able to see him interact, to play, to eat and to be a student. From what I have seen, he seems to be doing well. He has friends that knows him, and he introduced them to me (he is very proud of his parents). He acts like a normal kid would act with his friends. And because he is normal, he neglects his snacks and preferred to play. He was running around, sometimes playing tag, sometimes playing explorer, sometimes playing cops and robbers. No wonder he looks like a rag doll when he gets home. With all that done in the morning, we get a little break and prepare to meet his form teacher in the afternoon.

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On the way back to school, we were having our normal conversation. Which means talking about trees, cars and motorbikes. Those are the things we see on the walk to school. In that conversation, there is a mix of what was it like before this and what it would be after that. This is normal kid talk, and we probably could have covered a small section of an encyclopedia.

I already knew what to expect when we had the chance to talk to Mr. Vik. That Jakjak was doing well academically. It was the little things that he had trouble with. Things like writing neatly, or keeping his pencils within his work area, or just paying more attention in class (he brings a book for silent reading - to be used only during mother tongue class). He was also noted for his rather talkative behavior during class, which was distracting to his classmates. Other than that, his teacher was pretty happy with his performance in school. He was easy to get along with and he was never really difficult to teach. He was commended for his English and his neutral attitude in school too. All in all, we were also happy about his school performance. He did better than expected in some areas, and while he still may need improvement in others, we are looking at a very bright future.

Lighting Up The Night

The Singapore Night Festival. It's a time in Singapore where, for a difference, the museums are open at night. It has been a yearly event that I remember from when we first went to one. I still remember braving the rain on the first Night Festival that we went to. Not just the rain, but we had no idea how to get there in the first place. We were lost and wet, but we were hooked. Nothing plays with your senses like light and shadows.

We hoped that there would be no rain that night, and thankfully, there was none. Singapore being Singapore though, it was still hot and humid even without the scorching sun. Still, it was a good night. The displays were playful and inviting. I mean, who can resist a bunch of eyeballs looking down at you from three stories up, right?

The Night Festival stretches through the museums from Bras Basah all the way to Dhoby Ghout. Unfortunately, we aren't that young anymore, that, and Jakjak is not as keen in walking as much as we used to. So we spent most of the night at the Singapore Art Museum (SAM). We saw giant eyeballs, a humongous aquarium (filled with goldfish) and shadows playing. The highlight for SAM would be the light projections on the building's facade. Cinematic images projected to the shape, nooks and crannies of the art deco building. It morphed from jungles to futurism and decay. I'm sure the artists had a blast creating those effects. It felt a bit lacking though, like it didn't have enough oomph to lift up the night. I guess they left that for the pyrotechnics reserved to the National Museum of Singapore (NSM).

We still managed to walk around and enjoy the busy atmosphere. Tourists and non-touriststs alike were taking up the streets like ants (adding to the heat and humidity). Still, there were street performances spread across the estate it seems, making sure that the whole event was never without a gap. It was still a very good night. A night filled with art and lights. It's amazing really, how Singapore manages these things year in and year out. All the better for the kids I say (and the kids at heart).

The Patience Of A Slug

After being called in to the office (school) with mum, obviously, there would be a discussion over the dinner table.

It's not the first time we had a discussion about school. We have seen Jakjak's works from K2 to his present state. For a child of his age, we have always believed that he has been doing well. He is not excelling in math, but everywhere else, we know that he is good. He has always been commended for his english from time to time, and his quest for information has also been noticed as well.

It was a surprise then that Jakjak's homeroom teacher asked to meet with mum. Well, maybe not that surprising, but the reason was not quite what we expected. The teacher asked for help to motivate the young one. In math. Like what we had thought, he has trouble staying in focus. We know that by heart because that's how he is at home. He has too many thoughts running through his head that he doesn't know what to do first.

In our world, motivation is not simply giving him a goal. He is way too passive to really give it much thought. He just puts his main attention someplace else. It's not motivation that he needs, it's attention. Attention that we have been giving him since he was born. Undivided attention that he needs but he can't give back in return. Fair enough, although we spoiled him like this I guess.

To give him that much attention though, requires patience. To allow him to learn while having that attention requires even more patience. But he learns. And he learns quite well like this. But to give him this much attention requires the patience of a slug. Patience that usually runs thin in a world that moves as fast as mobile phones change models. Patience that dad needs to learn and earn to progress Jakjak further.

Power Struggle

Mum had received a call from Jakjak's homeroom teacher asking her to come to school. We don't normally get calls from school unless it was an emergency or it was Jakjak calling from the general office. It turns out, Jakjak seems to be giving his teacher a difficult time (imagine that).

The way the teacher described the situation, it was a hauntingly familiar scene that we experience in the house. On a daily basis. And in order to help both ourselves and Jakjak (and his teacher too), I decided that I needed some help. Help that Mr. Google was all too good to provide the links to. Yes, parenting has been around for too long, and yet, every parent and every child is different, and sometimes we need new ideas when our own wells have dried up. Luckily for the parents of my generation, we can now go online.

Jakjak's problem seems to be boredom. I don't want to say that the school or the teacher is boring. But it may not be the style that Jakjak appreciates. A lot of the things he knows, he learned by reading books and watching TV. Yes, he managed to make watching TV a productive habit. Once he learned how to read, he just couldn't stop. He reads almost anything that has letters resembling words. We are actually very proud parents of a certified bookworm. And because we have watched him grow up (and possibly made him do the things his way), we have a feeling that normal schooling may turn out to be a little boring for him. He has this way of learning that is not conservative. He is a non-conformist. Not rebellious mind you, but he sees things slightly different from others. I would even venture to say that he has a gift. A pretty odd one, but he has a gift that has not yet bloomed into full.

He does tend to be hard headed at times. A bit headstrong. We don't look at it as a sign of defiance, but rather of self respect, of expecting others to respect who he is. And while we all exercise respect for each other, there are times when he does become a little more difficult than usual. It is a time that we forget he is a kid and treat him as an adult, when he really is only just six. The website I went to called this as a power struggle. And I would tend to agree. It is a clash of ideals when both parents and their children both want to be heard. And in the end, they both do get heard, except sometimes after a tiny squabble. It's normal, but it is avoidable. This ends up in how much respect you have built and taught each other through the years. What is important is to retain that trust, that healthy relationship between the kids and the parents. A relationship where both know their limits, but are allowed to express their thoughts with mutual respect. 

I do believe that we have that bond. It may seem odd to others how we do things in the family. But right now, it is what works. We give each other room to breathe. We allow each other to express their feelings, be it good or not so good. Because we always remind each other that we are loved, we have never ended a "discussion" in a way that is not resolved at first light. (Thank goodness Jakjak knows how to turn things around)

Dad Does The Groceries

It is not uncommon for us to do the groceries together. Mum, me and Jakjak. We all have our aisles of specialty. And we have always enjoyed going to the grocery even when Jakjak was still only big enough to fit on the carrier (he's grown too big for that now and he needs to sit inside the cart itself). Mum brings a list that is never enough (it always magically grows to twice its length), Jakjak just grabs whatever catches his eye, and dad, well, dad puts anything that has dollar signs of more than a single digit for a price tag back on the shelf.

Every once in a while, dad is left to do the groceries (for whatever reason). And you can see the difference when the cart reaches the counter.

Recently, I bought a pack of sponges. Normal ones that cost less than 5 dollars. On a normal day, we would have bought 1 pc for 3 dollars. I bought soda that was less than 2 dollars for 1.5L. Normally, we would have gotten a 6-pack for roughly 4 dollars with only about 300 ml in excess of the 1.5L that we now have. Yes, I can be a cheapskate. Although not all the time. Yes, there are times that I splurge, or I overspend on something utterly useless. And it would bother me to no end when it happens. So much so, that I would not be buying anything until the thought is out of my head. And that takes a while to be honest.

Mum, is a believer that quality comes with a price. And while that is true most of the time, sometimes the price that it comes with is somewhat unreasonable. Yes, it does last longer, and yes it does look easier on the eye. But there have been a few times that I do a double take on something just because I am used to a different price range. Over time though, I have learned that between my being cheap and mum being quantifiably not as cheap as I am, we found balance and have lived decently and surprisingly light.

In general, there are things worth their price and some that are not. The difference between them is determined by how much you need it and how useful it is for you. For us, these are some of the things we found worth their penny.

Factory priced diapers. These are the same diapers sold in supermarkets, with the only difference is them not being packed in fancy colorful wrappers.

Avent bottles and nipples. Yes, these are pricey, but their reliability far outweighs their purchase price. While the sterilizer (Avent) is nice to have, a generic one will do just fine. The only problem being that the Avent bottles will not fit as snug.

A good high chair. High chairs may be a dime a dozen in some stores, but you need one that will be comfortable and will grow properly with your child. Don't go for those chair-to-table convertibles. They were designed to be both and are only fairly good as either one. If you need a chair, get a chair. Chances are, you will use it through it's life before you actually need a table.

A car seat. Sure, you want to snuggle up to your baby as much as possible. And they may not want to be sat in a car seat at all either. But once they are used to it, your life on the road will be smoother and safer.

Good shoes. It is guaranteed that your child will run through shoes (footwear in general) faster than you. Jakjak, on average, goes through about 4-5 pairs in a year. In comparison, my shoes can last me 1-2 years. Imagine if those 5 pairs were not that good, he may have needed more. On the plus side, they are generally more comfortable shoes.

There is more to this list that I want to add. Maybe the next time I do the groceries I will update this list.

Rich Dad, Poor Dad

As a parent, we seem to have this niggling obligation to give only the best to our children. Our priorities now change to our children first, and us second. And because it is what it is, I now also know how difficult it is, especially when finances become a deciding factor. It is a fact that not everyone is blessed with financial freedom. But everyone who is blessed with children know that there is something about the quality of life that we provide our children that will leave them with a legacy that they will remember.

I can only imagine how hard it must have been for my parents to make ends meet during the times that we were not as blessed as we were. It's frustrating in a way, because even as you struggle to think how best to give everything to your family, you also know that the limit is there and it has already been set. You can only adapt. And those who can't, end up being even more frustrated.

When people say "it's not about the money", I always take it with a grain of salt. This is because it is ideal to live and think this way. The question is, how many of us can actually say they have been living in this way? The reality is that in this world, money not only makes the world go round, it feeds you, it gives you a roof, it gives you warm clothes, it is a tool for survival. Those who cannot see this are either naive or very very rich already. Used wisely, it can get you through the day and then some.

It takes effort, it takes luck, it takes work to achieve anything in life. As a father, as a husband, I take it seriously to be the provider. I need help from time to time, and I don't hide that fact. In fact, I think that hiding it only makes things worst as when you reach the boiling point, it may already be too late to be helped. Life is not going to be easy, but for those who live their lives, it will be worth it.

To be honest, I learned all of these, from Dr. Seuss. Yes, Jakjak's books teach life lessons in a way that a child can appreciate, and because I have already lived a part of my life, fatherhood has become a refresher. And it is cool. Because I now have things to teach my son. Dr. Seuss has written for me these lessons, in a language that a 6 year old can comprehend. I wish I had written it. But if it ain't broke, there's no need to fix it. At least not yet.

Handling Toddler-dom

Jakjak asked to be brought to a play place in Terminal 3. It's actually just a toy store, but they have a Tomica playset on display that kids can play with. It looks like you would have to buy your Tomica car from the shop to play with on the track, and that was proving to be an expensive hobby. So this time, we decided to bring our own (properly labeled with Jakjak's name at the bottom, just in case).

It's not a difficult place to play in, just that sometimes, kids think that the cars are free to play with. With Jakjak however, things can get different.

He is six years old now, and we think that he is mature enough to think on his own. He probably is, because he had been quite nice in dealing with his peers even a few years back. He is quite happy to share his toys if he feels like it (we probably already lost quite a number of his toys this way), and is quick to tell other kids off when they snatch things away from him. He doesn't get mad, nor does he get into fights like some children do when they get intimidated. He simply asks for his toy back explaining that it's his. If they don't give it back, he puts a little force in taking it back, and then cools off by bringing the toy back to me (or mum) and we walk away for a few minutes. Later on, he's back playing merrily like nothing happened.

We do think that there are instances that kids grow up faster than others and that there are stages in their lives that they live through as "kids". With Jakjak, we just think that he may have skipped that stage of being a "me" person. Ok, maybe not 100%. But when he was at that stage, it was brief, and it was mostly only to us (you know, he just takes things from mum and dad and won't share things with us - which he does not do too often to others). Oh, and his cousin, but we always figured he was just getting back at him for all the quarrels that they had.

Bringing kids up can be an interesting journey. And while there are no right or wrong ways to bring up children (this is subjective, of course), there are methods that work for different types of children. It's the parents' job to find which works and which doesn't. And this can be a very tedious process as these methods have variations and may only work at certain times. It's frustrating at times, but very rewarding once you get the hang of it.

We did our best not to hold back on Jakjak as best as we can with toys and the like. This was governed by a couple of things. Would he learn something from it? Is it worth the price? Would he grow with it? Would dad have fun with it when Jakjak is not using it? We usually scratch that last criteria. Honest. So, even if we went to toy stores and look at the toys (we even spend good to a few minutes testing the sample units), we don't normally buy toys. On occasion, Jakjak would come back to the same toy for a couple of visits, that is usually a sign that he really, really likes something. That's when we buy. In time, he got used to not buying toys. And because of that attitude, he started to treat receiving toys as a surprise, and he became more appreciative of things at the same time. We had just taught him about gratitude, and we didn't even know it.

So Much To Do, So Little Time

It's already past the school holidays and I feel that we have accomplished so little. Well, at least Mum and Jakjak have been up and about for some days. Dad on the other hand, fell ill on one of the weekends.

It's sad because Singapore is littered with a whole bunch of things to do with your children for the 1 month break.

So, what have we managed to do?

Well, we at least have been out to the beach for a few days. That would probably be the highlight this time around. Jakjak still has the split color to prove it. Jakjak enjoyed this the most as he was able to play with his cousins and spent most of his days in the pool. I was looking to see if he grew gills after that trip.

We also managed to get Tangled at the Kid's Art Festival. That one was a sticky situation. It was the most fun a person could have tying knots and not having to worry about untying it afterwards. We still got to go around the area a little bit and hang out from coffee shops, playgrounds and restaurants. And I guess you could say that we managed to hang around and about the other days and hours of the weeks that we had free.

We attempted to have a go at a Thomas the Train event but fell short as the entry fee was quite steep for an old chugger (don't get me wrong, we love Thomas, we just think that he is a bit overpriced).

Jakjak and Dad had their day out at the Singapore Art Museum one weekend where the installation "Art Garden" has returned. Some of the activities were the same as last year's, but there were some new ones as well. The round ping pong table was ridiculous fun. And there was the sound room where art reacted to one's level of loudness. The video wall was good fun with Jakjak getting groovy and all. We got creative making a flower magnet using clay and everyday objects like clips and pen caps.

Changi Airport also had something under it's roof. A Safari. It's a big playground at Terminal 3 where Jakjak was able to run, climb, jump and play. He made a few new friends, considering we were only able to go there twice before they had to pack up. Interestingly enough, the people that watch the kids in the Safari remembered Jakjak when we came back. We're still missing the race track on the T3 parking area that was setup long ago, but still, Changi Airport always has something for everyone.

There was the occassional trip to the mall, window shopping, playground hopping, toy buying and house lounging. And since Dad only has a few days in a week to spend, those days were a cherished lot. School holidays weren't a big deal for us before, I guess that was because Jakjak still wasn't in school yet. Now, these days are precious. Looking forward to weekends with the family until the next long school break.

Counting Dad Years

It's only been 6 years plus (give or take) since my son Matthew (Jakjak) was born. There are days that I feel that it's been a lot more than that. And there are days that I feel that I could use some more.

Being a dad is like any normal profession. You have good days and you have bad days. You really can't win them all, it's just the way you handle the situations that get thrown at you.

Personally, my life as a father began during pregnancy. Thankfully, my wife was the one pregnant and not me (fathers, our wives deserve much more credit in the building and assembly process of our children than we give them credit for). So, while moving along this stage, we (myself and the wife) learned as much as we could and have been preparing for our first child months before he decided to come out from mum's tummy. I say this because, for those who remember, Jakjak came out much too early than he was supposed to. From then on, it has been a roller coaster ride.

Sleepless nights and wacky mornings were the order if the first year of daddy-hood. Breastfeeding - err - bottlefeeding in the wee hours of the morning and never ending clean up days, not to mention washing and bathing and poo-cleaning (my all-time favorite). All throughout, it had still been a learning process with changes to Jakjak's formula and soon after changes to his baby food as well. Then there was the hunt for good and cheap disposable diapers (we had a lucky find in a nearby shop). And then there was that time that he fell off the bed ...

The sitting and walking stages followed with as much excitement as watching your puppy learn a new trick. In all honesty, it was even more exciting than that. Those were the days that Jakjak had been finding his grip on the walls and clinging to anyone walking beside him. Until he figured out how to use his baby walker as a car to zoom around the house (well, not without accidentally pinching his fingers on the table's edge) ...

And then there was the talking. "Pickipao" he says. And that's for just about everything he wants to say. But there's also the laughter, the most enjoyable, most relaxing, most contagious laughter that any parent could ever have come across. I mean, I love children's laughter, but there is simply nothing to compare your own child's laughter to ...

And then there's potty training. A milestone in a child's and a parent's lifetime. It's the time that you get to stop changing stinky diapers and start washing stinky buttocks (Jakjak doesn't like the word butt you see). It's true though. Because when the child already knows how to talk, he can actually already tell you what he needs to do. Poo and Pee aren't exactly difficult words. The wonders of nature are truly amazing ...

Suddenly, he's talking and walking like he's the king of the world. And you feel that he has grown up so fast, and yet you know that he still has a lot to learn. Every once in a while, he will do something that is not so childish and you'll think that he's ready for the world. But then, he does something so childish that you feel thankful that you are still young enough to be there to teach him about the world.

And then we find ourselves sitting in the living room together as a family. We just sit there, watch TV, have a bag of chips and chit chat our way through the night. Simple things. And then we remember the things we had gone through together, the tough times, the worrisome times and we shrug our shoulders and say, here we are now. We know there will be more of those times, maybe even tougher, maybe even more worrisome, but we just have to stick through it, as a family, and I figure we'll do just fine. Surely, fatherhood has eaten a chunk of years in my life (more than what the calendar actually says), probably more than dog years, but I wouldn't have it any other way. I love this job.

Sprint, Run, Dash

NOTE: The recent policy changes by Google has left me thinking about the proprietary rights of my work. This is the reason why there has been a pause in my blog. I am still not convinced if these changes have (or have not) actually made Google "evil", but I am currently taking precautions. Whethere it is called for or not. This is only temporary and I shall resume regular blogging in due time.

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A few months ago, while I was registering Jakjak for the Cold Storage Kid's Run, I asked him if he wanted me to run with him as in prevous runs. To my surprise, he told me he wanted to run on his own. It was good, really, I told myself. At the time, I felt proud that he was being independent and competitive. I knew that he was growing up (a bit faster than I was hoping for). And at the sale time, I felt a bit of a worry. The kind of worry that dad's have watching their children grow up. I was worried that he might not be as old as he thought he was to run on his own, I was worried that he might feel alone and scared during his run, I was worried about a lot of things. It's not because I don't think he could do it, it's just that I was afraid that he might not cope with not being the best in case he does not win.

The weeks poured on and we forgot all about training and practice. We would eventually end up running short sprints as we were playing tag, but never any real distance running. And before we knew it, it was race day.

The morning did not turn out as calm as we were hoping for. Being earlier than 9, it wasn't really our best "waking hour". So we all struggled to get ourselves straightened out and ready for the race. We got there, eventually, with a few minutes to spare (and thankfully, no more grumpy people with us). The pep talk only began as we were settling in. By that time, Jakjak had already been fully awake and aware of his surroundings. We reminded him that he may not be able see us during the race because parents are no longer allowed to run the track in the category that he was in. We told him that we would be at the finish line waiting for him. We also told him to do his best, and that no matter what, he should have fun.

It took a while for us to find him in the batch he was running with, but once we did, and we acknowledged him running, it was all out. He was smiling all the way. I could see him getting tired (we never really trained for running) but I could also see his determination in finishing the race. All the marshalls were cheering everybody on and I was running along the sides with a camera and bag in tow. I never realized how long 800m was until that day. We reached the finish line. Well, Jakjak did. I walked my way to the finish line in the last few meters, he managed to sprint ahead of a few more kids. It was like he had been saving his speed until the last minute. It was great, he made us real proud.

At the pick up point, this is what he said: "Dad, I did not win. But I did my best". All this with a smile on his face (although I could tell that he was a bit disappointed). I didn't know if it was tears or sweat that was making my eyes water at that moment. My little baby, is not so little anymore.

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All my fears of him falling down during the race was gone the moment he crossed that finish line. He could be careless at times, which is why I am always uneasy when he is alone. Of course, being Jakjak, he did get into a small accident after the race. We were simply resting and catching our breath when he got caught in a safety net and tripped. Well, you can't win it all. 

The Titanic Obsession

Yes, it is in fact true. We went back to the ArtScience Museum to bring Jakjak to the Titanic exhibition. We did this right after watching Wicked, but in his mind, it was the Titanic that he was thinking about. In fact, when he saw the white lotus shaped building, he immediately started shouting "Titanic! Titanic!".

Ever since the first time we went to see it, Jakjak has been obsessed with the ship. We thought that the second time he saw it, he would finally be content and it would die out. I guess not. He sees pieces of the Titanic in everyday things. Even the small things like how a hallway looks and how a seat or a lamp looks like the one on the Titanic. All his toys now have to be broken in half to simulate the separation of the Titanic's bow from it's stern.

We have almost completed a project together which is a paper mache model of the Titanic. Initially, it was going to be a static model, but now it is one where the funnels break off from the ship. Thankfully, what we built seems to be strong enough to take the abuse. All that's left is to put in little details and then it sets sail.

He also has a copy of National Geographic's Titanic centennial edition. He has watched every Titanic related show on History channel and Nat Geo. He even watched, and finished, the James Cameron movie of Titanic (which runs slightly above 2 hours!). Every now and then he mentions the ship, the artifacts he saw, the stories he has heard, the video clips that he has seen. This, I believe, is obsession.

UPDATE: The Titanic paper mache we have been building is completed halfway except for the four funnels, which, apparently always gets "misplaced". We now also have a 3D puzzle version of the Titanic which we recently got from BHG.

*Jakjak himself took this picture complete with backdrop. :)