Care Bear

I got a boo-boo in my hand. Somehow, I accidentally cut my finger with a razor (yes, it's pretty lame). And of course, it bled. Jakjak saw this and was immediately by my side looking over the boo-boo. In the blink of an eye, he was dragging a chair to the bedroom. He was soon up on it and inside the closet. He reached out and grabbed our first aid kit, opened it up and took a plaster from it. He told me to wash my hands and before you can say ouchie, he was putting the plaster on the boo-boo. One can't help but smile over something so simplistic and yet so meaningful. For him, he was helping out in a way that he knew how (by watching mum tend to his own boo-boo). To me, he was showing how much he has grown and how responsible he is towards people.

Maybe it's a one-time thing for now, or maybe it's not. After all, he had always had a kind demeanor. He looks after his peers like a big brother. And that is one of his most noticeable traits (next to being so talkative at least). He truly is one of a kind, and he has done a lot of things that make us proud.

A child copying what his parents are doing is one thing, and a child genuinely showing compassion is another. As parents, we may overlook this, but if we forget for a moment that he is our child, one will notice that all of it is real. That he is not simply copying what you have been doing, but he had learned why you are doing it and is actually emphatic about it all. Once you realize this, you can smile and rest on the fact that he is growing up as a fine child indeed.

That Big Head

Boys will be boys. So the saying goes.

And what is it that boys actually do? Let's see if I can remember as much as I think I can.

Back in the Philippines, we had an electric fan. A small desk fan with plastic blades and rather standard sized grills. Jakjak was just a year and a half old (I'm guessing here). While the fan was dwindling down after being turned off, he stuck his finger in. It rattled a bit and we only saw his arm retracting back to where it had been previously. "Ouch", he said.

There was this time that we were sitting patiently at Food Republic in Suntec while looking around waiting for a seat. Jakjak was just a little more than 3 years old, and he was sat beside a candelabra lit with a standard incandescent bulb. Curious, he touched the bulb and all we heard after that was a swoosh. His hand flew out of the candelabra faster than how it went in, and then a small squeal, "ouch", he said.

When he was 5 years old, he had a Valkyrie. That's a Robotech toy, a jet that can transform into a walker and then a robot. It was one of those Japanese culture unique super deformed toys. This one, however, had tires that could be removed (but shouldn't). One day, there was supposed to be 2 tires, but there was only 1. When we asked him where it was, he said he put it in his nose. We did not want to believe that he would do that to himself (we taught him better - or so we thought). Since mum did not want to take chances, she brought him to the doctor. But the local doctor was not fit to remove the tire from his tiny nostril, so he had to be sent to a specialist children's hospital. True enough, they plucked the tire out of his nose (after knocking him out with some sleeping gas).

Recently, he had been in and out and down and under the shelves at a shop in the mall. He always does this, to hide inside the clothes hanging on the racks so we paid him no mind. He soon stuck his head between two rails holding the shelf up. "Mum, I'm stuck". When we found him, his head was under the shelf with his body dangling out from the opposite side. "Mum, I'm stuck. Really!". And as we tried plucking him out, we found out that his big head was indeed stuck between the rails. While trying to get him out, we caught the attention of a couple who were probably thinking "what in the world are those three blokes doing?". A few nudges and pulls later, we decided to do it the other way around and push him in further. Luckily, his body was small enough to fit further in and he managed to get on the shelf and slide out from the side of it.

Oh yes, the things that little boys do.

Lighting Up The Night

The Singapore Night Festival. It's a time in Singapore where, for a difference, the museums are open at night. It has been a yearly event that I remember from when we first went to one. I still remember braving the rain on the first Night Festival that we went to. Not just the rain, but we had no idea how to get there in the first place. We were lost and wet, but we were hooked. Nothing plays with your senses like light and shadows.

We hoped that there would be no rain that night, and thankfully, there was none. Singapore being Singapore though, it was still hot and humid even without the scorching sun. Still, it was a good night. The displays were playful and inviting. I mean, who can resist a bunch of eyeballs looking down at you from three stories up, right?

The Night Festival stretches through the museums from Bras Basah all the way to Dhoby Ghout. Unfortunately, we aren't that young anymore, that, and Jakjak is not as keen in walking as much as we used to. So we spent most of the night at the Singapore Art Museum (SAM). We saw giant eyeballs, a humongous aquarium (filled with goldfish) and shadows playing. The highlight for SAM would be the light projections on the building's facade. Cinematic images projected to the shape, nooks and crannies of the art deco building. It morphed from jungles to futurism and decay. I'm sure the artists had a blast creating those effects. It felt a bit lacking though, like it didn't have enough oomph to lift up the night. I guess they left that for the pyrotechnics reserved to the National Museum of Singapore (NSM).

We still managed to walk around and enjoy the busy atmosphere. Tourists and non-touriststs alike were taking up the streets like ants (adding to the heat and humidity). Still, there were street performances spread across the estate it seems, making sure that the whole event was never without a gap. It was still a very good night. A night filled with art and lights. It's amazing really, how Singapore manages these things year in and year out. All the better for the kids I say (and the kids at heart).

Power Struggle

Mum had received a call from Jakjak's homeroom teacher asking her to come to school. We don't normally get calls from school unless it was an emergency or it was Jakjak calling from the general office. It turns out, Jakjak seems to be giving his teacher a difficult time (imagine that).

The way the teacher described the situation, it was a hauntingly familiar scene that we experience in the house. On a daily basis. And in order to help both ourselves and Jakjak (and his teacher too), I decided that I needed some help. Help that Mr. Google was all too good to provide the links to. Yes, parenting has been around for too long, and yet, every parent and every child is different, and sometimes we need new ideas when our own wells have dried up. Luckily for the parents of my generation, we can now go online.

Jakjak's problem seems to be boredom. I don't want to say that the school or the teacher is boring. But it may not be the style that Jakjak appreciates. A lot of the things he knows, he learned by reading books and watching TV. Yes, he managed to make watching TV a productive habit. Once he learned how to read, he just couldn't stop. He reads almost anything that has letters resembling words. We are actually very proud parents of a certified bookworm. And because we have watched him grow up (and possibly made him do the things his way), we have a feeling that normal schooling may turn out to be a little boring for him. He has this way of learning that is not conservative. He is a non-conformist. Not rebellious mind you, but he sees things slightly different from others. I would even venture to say that he has a gift. A pretty odd one, but he has a gift that has not yet bloomed into full.

He does tend to be hard headed at times. A bit headstrong. We don't look at it as a sign of defiance, but rather of self respect, of expecting others to respect who he is. And while we all exercise respect for each other, there are times when he does become a little more difficult than usual. It is a time that we forget he is a kid and treat him as an adult, when he really is only just six. The website I went to called this as a power struggle. And I would tend to agree. It is a clash of ideals when both parents and their children both want to be heard. And in the end, they both do get heard, except sometimes after a tiny squabble. It's normal, but it is avoidable. This ends up in how much respect you have built and taught each other through the years. What is important is to retain that trust, that healthy relationship between the kids and the parents. A relationship where both know their limits, but are allowed to express their thoughts with mutual respect. 

I do believe that we have that bond. It may seem odd to others how we do things in the family. But right now, it is what works. We give each other room to breathe. We allow each other to express their feelings, be it good or not so good. Because we always remind each other that we are loved, we have never ended a "discussion" in a way that is not resolved at first light. (Thank goodness Jakjak knows how to turn things around)

Dad Does The Groceries

It is not uncommon for us to do the groceries together. Mum, me and Jakjak. We all have our aisles of specialty. And we have always enjoyed going to the grocery even when Jakjak was still only big enough to fit on the carrier (he's grown too big for that now and he needs to sit inside the cart itself). Mum brings a list that is never enough (it always magically grows to twice its length), Jakjak just grabs whatever catches his eye, and dad, well, dad puts anything that has dollar signs of more than a single digit for a price tag back on the shelf.

Every once in a while, dad is left to do the groceries (for whatever reason). And you can see the difference when the cart reaches the counter.

Recently, I bought a pack of sponges. Normal ones that cost less than 5 dollars. On a normal day, we would have bought 1 pc for 3 dollars. I bought soda that was less than 2 dollars for 1.5L. Normally, we would have gotten a 6-pack for roughly 4 dollars with only about 300 ml in excess of the 1.5L that we now have. Yes, I can be a cheapskate. Although not all the time. Yes, there are times that I splurge, or I overspend on something utterly useless. And it would bother me to no end when it happens. So much so, that I would not be buying anything until the thought is out of my head. And that takes a while to be honest.

Mum, is a believer that quality comes with a price. And while that is true most of the time, sometimes the price that it comes with is somewhat unreasonable. Yes, it does last longer, and yes it does look easier on the eye. But there have been a few times that I do a double take on something just because I am used to a different price range. Over time though, I have learned that between my being cheap and mum being quantifiably not as cheap as I am, we found balance and have lived decently and surprisingly light.

In general, there are things worth their price and some that are not. The difference between them is determined by how much you need it and how useful it is for you. For us, these are some of the things we found worth their penny.

Factory priced diapers. These are the same diapers sold in supermarkets, with the only difference is them not being packed in fancy colorful wrappers.

Avent bottles and nipples. Yes, these are pricey, but their reliability far outweighs their purchase price. While the sterilizer (Avent) is nice to have, a generic one will do just fine. The only problem being that the Avent bottles will not fit as snug.

A good high chair. High chairs may be a dime a dozen in some stores, but you need one that will be comfortable and will grow properly with your child. Don't go for those chair-to-table convertibles. They were designed to be both and are only fairly good as either one. If you need a chair, get a chair. Chances are, you will use it through it's life before you actually need a table.

A car seat. Sure, you want to snuggle up to your baby as much as possible. And they may not want to be sat in a car seat at all either. But once they are used to it, your life on the road will be smoother and safer.

Good shoes. It is guaranteed that your child will run through shoes (footwear in general) faster than you. Jakjak, on average, goes through about 4-5 pairs in a year. In comparison, my shoes can last me 1-2 years. Imagine if those 5 pairs were not that good, he may have needed more. On the plus side, they are generally more comfortable shoes.

There is more to this list that I want to add. Maybe the next time I do the groceries I will update this list.

Rich Dad, Poor Dad

As a parent, we seem to have this niggling obligation to give only the best to our children. Our priorities now change to our children first, and us second. And because it is what it is, I now also know how difficult it is, especially when finances become a deciding factor. It is a fact that not everyone is blessed with financial freedom. But everyone who is blessed with children know that there is something about the quality of life that we provide our children that will leave them with a legacy that they will remember.

I can only imagine how hard it must have been for my parents to make ends meet during the times that we were not as blessed as we were. It's frustrating in a way, because even as you struggle to think how best to give everything to your family, you also know that the limit is there and it has already been set. You can only adapt. And those who can't, end up being even more frustrated.

When people say "it's not about the money", I always take it with a grain of salt. This is because it is ideal to live and think this way. The question is, how many of us can actually say they have been living in this way? The reality is that in this world, money not only makes the world go round, it feeds you, it gives you a roof, it gives you warm clothes, it is a tool for survival. Those who cannot see this are either naive or very very rich already. Used wisely, it can get you through the day and then some.

It takes effort, it takes luck, it takes work to achieve anything in life. As a father, as a husband, I take it seriously to be the provider. I need help from time to time, and I don't hide that fact. In fact, I think that hiding it only makes things worst as when you reach the boiling point, it may already be too late to be helped. Life is not going to be easy, but for those who live their lives, it will be worth it.

To be honest, I learned all of these, from Dr. Seuss. Yes, Jakjak's books teach life lessons in a way that a child can appreciate, and because I have already lived a part of my life, fatherhood has become a refresher. And it is cool. Because I now have things to teach my son. Dr. Seuss has written for me these lessons, in a language that a 6 year old can comprehend. I wish I had written it. But if it ain't broke, there's no need to fix it. At least not yet.

Handling Toddler-dom

Jakjak asked to be brought to a play place in Terminal 3. It's actually just a toy store, but they have a Tomica playset on display that kids can play with. It looks like you would have to buy your Tomica car from the shop to play with on the track, and that was proving to be an expensive hobby. So this time, we decided to bring our own (properly labeled with Jakjak's name at the bottom, just in case).

It's not a difficult place to play in, just that sometimes, kids think that the cars are free to play with. With Jakjak however, things can get different.

He is six years old now, and we think that he is mature enough to think on his own. He probably is, because he had been quite nice in dealing with his peers even a few years back. He is quite happy to share his toys if he feels like it (we probably already lost quite a number of his toys this way), and is quick to tell other kids off when they snatch things away from him. He doesn't get mad, nor does he get into fights like some children do when they get intimidated. He simply asks for his toy back explaining that it's his. If they don't give it back, he puts a little force in taking it back, and then cools off by bringing the toy back to me (or mum) and we walk away for a few minutes. Later on, he's back playing merrily like nothing happened.

We do think that there are instances that kids grow up faster than others and that there are stages in their lives that they live through as "kids". With Jakjak, we just think that he may have skipped that stage of being a "me" person. Ok, maybe not 100%. But when he was at that stage, it was brief, and it was mostly only to us (you know, he just takes things from mum and dad and won't share things with us - which he does not do too often to others). Oh, and his cousin, but we always figured he was just getting back at him for all the quarrels that they had.

Bringing kids up can be an interesting journey. And while there are no right or wrong ways to bring up children (this is subjective, of course), there are methods that work for different types of children. It's the parents' job to find which works and which doesn't. And this can be a very tedious process as these methods have variations and may only work at certain times. It's frustrating at times, but very rewarding once you get the hang of it.

We did our best not to hold back on Jakjak as best as we can with toys and the like. This was governed by a couple of things. Would he learn something from it? Is it worth the price? Would he grow with it? Would dad have fun with it when Jakjak is not using it? We usually scratch that last criteria. Honest. So, even if we went to toy stores and look at the toys (we even spend good to a few minutes testing the sample units), we don't normally buy toys. On occasion, Jakjak would come back to the same toy for a couple of visits, that is usually a sign that he really, really likes something. That's when we buy. In time, he got used to not buying toys. And because of that attitude, he started to treat receiving toys as a surprise, and he became more appreciative of things at the same time. We had just taught him about gratitude, and we didn't even know it.

So Much To Do, So Little Time

It's already past the school holidays and I feel that we have accomplished so little. Well, at least Mum and Jakjak have been up and about for some days. Dad on the other hand, fell ill on one of the weekends.

It's sad because Singapore is littered with a whole bunch of things to do with your children for the 1 month break.

So, what have we managed to do?

Well, we at least have been out to the beach for a few days. That would probably be the highlight this time around. Jakjak still has the split color to prove it. Jakjak enjoyed this the most as he was able to play with his cousins and spent most of his days in the pool. I was looking to see if he grew gills after that trip.

We also managed to get Tangled at the Kid's Art Festival. That one was a sticky situation. It was the most fun a person could have tying knots and not having to worry about untying it afterwards. We still got to go around the area a little bit and hang out from coffee shops, playgrounds and restaurants. And I guess you could say that we managed to hang around and about the other days and hours of the weeks that we had free.

We attempted to have a go at a Thomas the Train event but fell short as the entry fee was quite steep for an old chugger (don't get me wrong, we love Thomas, we just think that he is a bit overpriced).

Jakjak and Dad had their day out at the Singapore Art Museum one weekend where the installation "Art Garden" has returned. Some of the activities were the same as last year's, but there were some new ones as well. The round ping pong table was ridiculous fun. And there was the sound room where art reacted to one's level of loudness. The video wall was good fun with Jakjak getting groovy and all. We got creative making a flower magnet using clay and everyday objects like clips and pen caps.

Changi Airport also had something under it's roof. A Safari. It's a big playground at Terminal 3 where Jakjak was able to run, climb, jump and play. He made a few new friends, considering we were only able to go there twice before they had to pack up. Interestingly enough, the people that watch the kids in the Safari remembered Jakjak when we came back. We're still missing the race track on the T3 parking area that was setup long ago, but still, Changi Airport always has something for everyone.

There was the occassional trip to the mall, window shopping, playground hopping, toy buying and house lounging. And since Dad only has a few days in a week to spend, those days were a cherished lot. School holidays weren't a big deal for us before, I guess that was because Jakjak still wasn't in school yet. Now, these days are precious. Looking forward to weekends with the family until the next long school break.

Counting Dad Years

It's only been 6 years plus (give or take) since my son Matthew (Jakjak) was born. There are days that I feel that it's been a lot more than that. And there are days that I feel that I could use some more.

Being a dad is like any normal profession. You have good days and you have bad days. You really can't win them all, it's just the way you handle the situations that get thrown at you.

Personally, my life as a father began during pregnancy. Thankfully, my wife was the one pregnant and not me (fathers, our wives deserve much more credit in the building and assembly process of our children than we give them credit for). So, while moving along this stage, we (myself and the wife) learned as much as we could and have been preparing for our first child months before he decided to come out from mum's tummy. I say this because, for those who remember, Jakjak came out much too early than he was supposed to. From then on, it has been a roller coaster ride.

Sleepless nights and wacky mornings were the order if the first year of daddy-hood. Breastfeeding - err - bottlefeeding in the wee hours of the morning and never ending clean up days, not to mention washing and bathing and poo-cleaning (my all-time favorite). All throughout, it had still been a learning process with changes to Jakjak's formula and soon after changes to his baby food as well. Then there was the hunt for good and cheap disposable diapers (we had a lucky find in a nearby shop). And then there was that time that he fell off the bed ...

The sitting and walking stages followed with as much excitement as watching your puppy learn a new trick. In all honesty, it was even more exciting than that. Those were the days that Jakjak had been finding his grip on the walls and clinging to anyone walking beside him. Until he figured out how to use his baby walker as a car to zoom around the house (well, not without accidentally pinching his fingers on the table's edge) ...

And then there was the talking. "Pickipao" he says. And that's for just about everything he wants to say. But there's also the laughter, the most enjoyable, most relaxing, most contagious laughter that any parent could ever have come across. I mean, I love children's laughter, but there is simply nothing to compare your own child's laughter to ...

And then there's potty training. A milestone in a child's and a parent's lifetime. It's the time that you get to stop changing stinky diapers and start washing stinky buttocks (Jakjak doesn't like the word butt you see). It's true though. Because when the child already knows how to talk, he can actually already tell you what he needs to do. Poo and Pee aren't exactly difficult words. The wonders of nature are truly amazing ...

Suddenly, he's talking and walking like he's the king of the world. And you feel that he has grown up so fast, and yet you know that he still has a lot to learn. Every once in a while, he will do something that is not so childish and you'll think that he's ready for the world. But then, he does something so childish that you feel thankful that you are still young enough to be there to teach him about the world.

And then we find ourselves sitting in the living room together as a family. We just sit there, watch TV, have a bag of chips and chit chat our way through the night. Simple things. And then we remember the things we had gone through together, the tough times, the worrisome times and we shrug our shoulders and say, here we are now. We know there will be more of those times, maybe even tougher, maybe even more worrisome, but we just have to stick through it, as a family, and I figure we'll do just fine. Surely, fatherhood has eaten a chunk of years in my life (more than what the calendar actually says), probably more than dog years, but I wouldn't have it any other way. I love this job.

Sprint, Run, Dash

NOTE: The recent policy changes by Google has left me thinking about the proprietary rights of my work. This is the reason why there has been a pause in my blog. I am still not convinced if these changes have (or have not) actually made Google "evil", but I am currently taking precautions. Whethere it is called for or not. This is only temporary and I shall resume regular blogging in due time.

---------

A few months ago, while I was registering Jakjak for the Cold Storage Kid's Run, I asked him if he wanted me to run with him as in prevous runs. To my surprise, he told me he wanted to run on his own. It was good, really, I told myself. At the time, I felt proud that he was being independent and competitive. I knew that he was growing up (a bit faster than I was hoping for). And at the sale time, I felt a bit of a worry. The kind of worry that dad's have watching their children grow up. I was worried that he might not be as old as he thought he was to run on his own, I was worried that he might feel alone and scared during his run, I was worried about a lot of things. It's not because I don't think he could do it, it's just that I was afraid that he might not cope with not being the best in case he does not win.

The weeks poured on and we forgot all about training and practice. We would eventually end up running short sprints as we were playing tag, but never any real distance running. And before we knew it, it was race day.

The morning did not turn out as calm as we were hoping for. Being earlier than 9, it wasn't really our best "waking hour". So we all struggled to get ourselves straightened out and ready for the race. We got there, eventually, with a few minutes to spare (and thankfully, no more grumpy people with us). The pep talk only began as we were settling in. By that time, Jakjak had already been fully awake and aware of his surroundings. We reminded him that he may not be able see us during the race because parents are no longer allowed to run the track in the category that he was in. We told him that we would be at the finish line waiting for him. We also told him to do his best, and that no matter what, he should have fun.

It took a while for us to find him in the batch he was running with, but once we did, and we acknowledged him running, it was all out. He was smiling all the way. I could see him getting tired (we never really trained for running) but I could also see his determination in finishing the race. All the marshalls were cheering everybody on and I was running along the sides with a camera and bag in tow. I never realized how long 800m was until that day. We reached the finish line. Well, Jakjak did. I walked my way to the finish line in the last few meters, he managed to sprint ahead of a few more kids. It was like he had been saving his speed until the last minute. It was great, he made us real proud.

At the pick up point, this is what he said: "Dad, I did not win. But I did my best". All this with a smile on his face (although I could tell that he was a bit disappointed). I didn't know if it was tears or sweat that was making my eyes water at that moment. My little baby, is not so little anymore.

-----

All my fears of him falling down during the race was gone the moment he crossed that finish line. He could be careless at times, which is why I am always uneasy when he is alone. Of course, being Jakjak, he did get into a small accident after the race. We were simply resting and catching our breath when he got caught in a safety net and tripped. Well, you can't win it all. 

Remembering The Titanic | 2012

The Singapore ArtScience Museum is holding a Titanic Artifact Exhibit. This will run until the 29th of April 2012. More information here: http://titanic.sg/.

We took Jakjak to the exhibit while we were there at Marina Bay Sands. It was a spontaneous thing as we didn't actually have any plans at all that Saturday. It just so happened that the trip to MBS now has become more convenient for us thanks to the Circle Line. The reason we went to MBS was to give Jakjak a gondola ride at the river floor. A ride we missed the week we were there for the iLight Marina Bay light exhibits. It was just for us to let of some steam and Jakjak certainly enjoyed the short roundabout trip on the gondola. 

As we were roaming around the bay area, taking in the cool breeze, taking photo breaks while Jakjak was running around, we came to the ArtScience Museum. We saw the posters of the Titanic exhibition and the model ship displayed at The Shoppes, but we weren't really paying that much attention. We figured, if it's free, why not go in and explore? Well, it wasn't free. But my wife bought the three of us tickets to go in anyway. Unfortunately, photography is strictly prohibited inside the hall. Not that it would have been very easy to do it in the dark anyway, but it would have been nice to get some souvenirs.

We were given our boarding passes as we entered the RMS Titanic. There were rusty remnants of what was salvaged off the great ship. Some of them as big as furniture for your home (It was the darkness in the hall that was eerie though). You walk through the re-made halls and rooms, areas that were created to mimic the real ship. And those small areas of the exhibit did make you feel like you were on board the RMS Titanic. Even the grand staircase was replicated and you were allowed to have your picture taken there, officially with the exhibit's photographer of course, which we did not go for. As you sift through the artifacts recovered from first class, you are then whisked away into third class where the difference between bunks and rooms are like night and day. And again you get to see artifacts recovered from the ship. You get to see parts of the ship that were torn off, the passenger's belongings that were found in their suitcases and cabins, the cargo that the ship was carrying as it made it's way to New York and other bits and pieces. The eeriest part was the deck of the ship where there is nothing but dark starlit sky outside. It was a great display and it really gave me goosebumps. It was like the exhibit brought with it the spirit of the Titanic, and it was the sadness of the tragedy that you feel through.

At the end, there was an iceberg which explained how most people died from hypothermia rather than drowning. And the passenger list where you can try finding the person that was on the boarding pass that was given to you at the start of the exhibit. In the passenger manifesto, mum's boarding pass holder survived, and those that were with me and Jakjak died. Ironically, the one that survived was in first class. And this is what Jakjak wrote on the journal: "My dad and I died! But my mom survived". 

The aftermath of it all was intense. Ever since that day, Jakjak has been obsessed with information about the Titanic. He has been through dozens of YouTube videos from National Geographic and Discovery Channel and even the film and parodies of the movie Titanic (you know, the one with Leo Dicaprio and Kate Winselt?). He now even talks about the RMS Titanic's sister ship, the Britannic. Day in and day out, one (or more) of his conversations will include facts and questions about the Titanic. He has been asking us to bring him back to the exhibit, and we just might. To get him answers and maybe he would finally let the Titanic rest in peace. And maybe so that he would stop singing Celine Dion's "My Heart Will Go On" (The Titanic movie's them song).

Athletically Speaking | 2012

I vaguely remember parts of my childhood. Not because I have forgotten, but because I chose to forget. In particular, I chose to forget about my history as a sportsman. This is because I was never one. I was nothing more than a bench warmer. I sucked at sports. After all these years, the only sport I have ever attempted to excel at is playing video games. But I'm now getting in over my head. This isn't about me, this is about Jakjak being a sportsman.


Jakjak's school recently held Junior Olympic Day. It's a closed school event, but with mum playing the role of a parent volunteer (PV), she had access to the event, the children, the teachers and this gave her the opportunity to try her hand out at being a soccer-mom.


As sports events go for primary schools, it's not all about championships and beating your opponent to a pulp. It's more about the children exerting effort and fostering teamwork. And that's what the children did, and they had fun while doing it. Of course, the parents of the kids doing volunteer work were probably cheering their own like crazy to win. And because there were a number of PVs there, some of the events made for teacher-student became parent-student events instead.

At the end of the day, Jakjak and his "team" brought home gold trophies for being the champion at P1 football, and mum and Jakjak also brought home a medal each for taking 3rd place in a parent-student event of stick-ball (gotta remember that he took home 3rd for Chapteh last year at K2 as well). Carelessly clumsy at times, when he is in control of his body movements, he seems to be an excellent athlete. The future is bright for this kid. 

posted from Bloggeroid

The Observer

I'm sitting here tonight on one corner of the "Oasis", a water playground for kids. And I'm just here observing, watching over Jakjak as he makes himself, well, wet.

It wasn't that long ago when Jakjak was first let off a water feature from a mall back home. That was at Market Market. He would be running around in his diapers until it got so wet and heavy that it falls off on it's own. That was some four years ago. All through the years after that, he still loves the water. Whether swimming, wading, splashing or even just misting.

His love for water aside, I am also observing how far he has grown. He is taller, albeit still not as plump as we would want him to be. It's not a bad thing though, in fact, it's good that his metabolism is better than expected. He burns energy as quickly as he stores it. He has the efficiency of a well oiled machine.

Being a well oiled machine though, he seems to be prone to accidents. Perhaps he has excess oils that contribute to his carelessness. We are not without giving him warning every time. He is just ... forgetful and un-mindful of the things going on around him. Carelessness aside though, he is  a very active little bugger. He runs, skips, jumps, climbs, crawls and contorts every which way. He is definitely no slouch and neither is he a sloth. He may be good enough to be in a circus to be honest.

The way he thinks is not what we expected. He is quite good at remembering things. Whether it is something he saw or something he heard, he would be able to recall it and even put up an argument if we were the ones who forgot. Speaking of arguments, he is one who uses logic and reason. Coupled with his memory, it's nearly impossible to bend the "rules", let alone change it completely. At least he knows right from wrong, and even with an argument, respect and understanding always manages to keep his world in order (and ours too). Thankfully, all this looks to be the making of a lawyer or a philospher. Hopefully. Maybe.

The most important thing for us however, is the way he expresses his emotions. He's not afraid to speak out and let us know what's happening inside him. There are reservations at times, and he don't always say it out loud, but he confides a lot of things with mum, which is good. And at the end of the day, a good conversation with Jakjak over a cup of milk is sure to be insightful at the least. Of course, conversations with Jakjak usually last for hours as he never seems to run out of things to say.

Time Travel, 250 Million Years Past | 2012

The Singapore Science Centre is a place of wonder (and it's not just for kids). Today, we went there for a visit to the land before time. Well, not exactly. You see, I heard that dinosaurs were at the Centre and that they were about to leave soon (something about Singapore being too warm for them, I think).

 Jakjak received a book about dinosaurs from his friend last Christmas (thanks Raine!). And aside from that, he had been watching (and reading) Harry and his bucket of dinosaurs as well. So there was interest and curiosity in his mind even before we went to meet the dinosaurs. I had a relationship with dinosaurs when I was a kid too, and even as I grew up, my fascination for these giant lizards never left me. It was going to be a good trip for both of us.


It wasn't our first time at the Science Centre, and in fact, we wanted to come here more often. But our geographic location (being at the other end of the island) was a burden. The Dinosaurs - Live! exhibition was a good excuse to be back here. While we still enjoyed the rest of the centre with what little time we had, it was the dinosaurs after all that were the star of the show.

We got our tickets, and we got our passports (an extra 2 bucks). It was dark and a bit crowded, but that may just be because of the way the path was set up. This made it a bit difficult to identify which dinosaur was which (even with name tags, as it was so dim). Still, it does not remove you from the experience as the dinosaurs growl and snap and wag their tails at you. Of course, being a couple of million years old, their movements aren't as fluid as they used to be. For someone who grew up wanting to see dinosaurs, this dad was kind of disappointed. Jakjak, on the other hand was having a blast. Having that passport had us hunting for stamps in the display area. Apart from those stamps, there were also mini-activities for kids to immerse themselves into. Again, it could have done with a little more light, but it didn't seem to matter to the kids anyway. The dinosaurs were pretty darn good looking. They may not be the real thing, but if you think like a child, it doesn't really matter, they are alive, and they are inviting you to a journey of discovery. All this without the fear of being eaten by any one of these beasts. We ended our dinosaur story with Jakjak doing something he always wanted, looking for dinosaur fossils!

This is just one of the things I love about Singapore. It's a great place to be a kid (and a dad to a kid). There is so much to do across the island and they are pretty much affordably decent. To me, it was a bonding experience that is simply priceless. This, and other activities for kids (and their parents) are always a trip worth every sweat and cent.


*The Dinosaurs - Live! ends it's run on the 26th of Feb 2012.

posted from Bloggeroid

Making A Name | 2012

Judy, my wife, had a chance to do some volunteer work in Jakjak's school. It is part of the plan in order to get in touch with the school and keep an eye on Jakjak as well. In this exercise, we found out how well the school actually knows its children. And it's surprisingly really good. Just about everyone knows Matthew (Jakjak's real name) from P1.


We were surprised to be honest. Of course, there is being famous and being infamous. At the moment, it seems that Jakjak is a mixture of both.


His homeroom teacher knows him. That is a given, considering he is probably the noisiest in his class (hopefully not). But aside from that, he has been commended for being good in English, after all, he has been speaking it like his native language. The vice principal also knows him. Apparently, he was usually found clinging on to a pole and defying going to class during the first few weeks. The principal also knows him, he had been especially mentioned for his detachment from Chinese class (which, thankfully, we have worked out partial exemption for Jakjak). And the other teachers too, especially when they saw Judy, who happens to be Jakak's major resemblance.



His first month in primary has been very rich in terms of experience. We heard about how he defended himself (and apparently others) from the naughty kids (he thinks he has super powers). Mum saw him being generous to his peers (too generous, really). And we have heard how sweet he is to teachers (this we already knew from the start, way back in pre-school). And the term has just begun. I'm pretty sure there are going to be more adventures, not just for Jakjak, but for those close to his heart as well.


(Dad 10/2/2012)

posted from Bloggeroid

Bah, Homework! | 2012

I still remember those days myself. I sit down with my mum, she flips through my workbooks and my notebooks and then taps her pencil on the table telling me to get ready for homework. Of course, my mum was teacher, so I've always thought that it was just a habit of hers. It only occurred to me that we had to do all that homework because school required us to when I heard my classmates complaining about it.


Fast forward to the current day and year, Jakjak is now in school. Homework in primary is quite different from those he had in pre-school (and not as much or as often). Along with the additional stress he feels while in school, it kind of gets messy when we sit down for homework.


I guess that kids see homework for what it is at their age level. Because a college student will treat homework differently than how a secondary school student would and definitely much more different than a primary school student. In terms of priority, in terms of impact and in terms of stress, a kid will treat homework simply as a nuisance to playing. As such, parents also see homework differently. It's that sense of responsibility that really kicks. We know that our kids need that homework done, but we also know our kids don't want it. And it becomes a chore to explain it to them which takes up time better spent actually doing the homework (and getting more playtime) in the first place.


After a few rumbles and tumbles with Jakjak, my wife hit me with a club. True enough, the point she wanted to let me know was quickly conveyed and understood. First, you shouldn't even attempt to teach about homework when you are unwell. Your personal frustration will just act as a catalyst to the additional frustration that is just about to mount. Second, do make sure that your son has had ample time to rest and be in a proper state of mind before you even mention that he has to do homework. Next, do tackle homework with extreme care. Especially when you both are on the edge of being irritable. Believe me, it's difficult to get back to the calmness of a windless afternoon (Never try to do homework when both of you have just woken up from an afternoon nap).

I do not have the same amount of patience that my wife has. And I don't have the same amount of cooling down period as well. It takes me twice the amoint of time it takes her to go from boiling mad to stoich. I may have anger management problems, but surely, it's not that bad. I just need some practice is all (maybe).

posted from Bloggeroid