Driving Ambitions | 2007

The Ferrari F50 was made to celebrate Ferrari's 50th anniversary. It was a monster of a car in it's time.

You could say it was one of Jakjak's first cars (He was one year old when he rode this). Of course, it was coin operated rather than petrol powered. It was made fiber glass instead of carbon fiber. But we all remember our firsts.

I have always been fascinated by cars. In fact, I love them. You would see me turn my head more often when I see a good looking car than a good looking girl. And because I was very open to this even when Jakjak is around, I think it has trickled down to the little fellow. 

I have always believed that toy cars are a boys first set of toys. Well, this becomes a slight fact only after the educational toys have come to pass. And even then, you can't force your child with toys that you want rather than what he wants. Because even with his toy cars (hand picked by his dad, of course), Jakjak plays with a doll house. Yep, a doll house. Probably because two of his older cousins were girls and this was one of their old toys. But yep, we let him play with his doll house. Of course, instead of dolls, he was using his hotwheels cars to sit on the couch, open the doors, peak through the windows and have tea parties. Go figure.

Still, parents will influence their child a great deal as they are growing up. This is because children only know three people in his world. His mum, his dad and himself. And at the tender age of one, his mum and his dad are his 'ultimates'. It will show in a few years time what influences you have, as a parent, given to your child. I know this because at four years old, Jakjak had carried on his dad's love for cars and has decided he wanted to be a Ferrari race car driver when he grows up! (There goes dad's bank account)

Pets | 2007

We were not exactly dog lovers in the sense that we never dressed them up like dolls.

But we love our dogs, even if they were locals (read: askal or asong kalye). Jakjak loved them too. Unfortunately, our dogs were a bit too big for him and they literally mug him with licks. That is until Muffet came along.

Muffet was a breed dog that came from my brother-in-law, Willie. He found the poor girl lost in the urban jungle and took her home. Jakjak immediately loved her because: 1.) She was smaller than he was. 2.) She was a friendly and playful little dog. Of course, she did need a lot of TLC to get her back in shape, being lost for some time. So a dozen baths, three haircuts and two lice removal sessions later, she was ready to romp.

Jakjak fed her. Jakjak walked her. Jakjak gave her more baths. Jakjak petted her. They were pretty good together, of course, Jakjak being Jakjak, it was not quite a perfect man's best friend relationship. You see, Jakjak fed her ... with his own ice cream that was melting in his hands. Jakjak walked her ... but she runs and drags Jakjak to follow her. Jakjak gave her baths ... while he was taking his own bath. Well, you get the picture.

But it was a good experience for him. In time he learned to be more responsible for his pet. That was what we really wanted him to learn. Love and respect for others. And I'd like to believe that having his own pet had taught him some of this.

Frustrating an Indie | 2007

As soon as Jakjak had learned how to walk properly, he took it as a sign of independence. For what it was worth, independence to him was just that, independently walking. 

He would shrug off our hands when we offered to guide him, and he would even run off at full speed trying to evade us. Which is fine, we thought, as kids probably wanted or even got frustrated at the things they are not able to do. So we give him the little pleasure of some independence.

At the end of the day, he still comes around and asks us to come with him. He still gets to come around and hold our hands when he feels wobbly on uneven terrain. He still comes back to ask us to open doors for him (but he insists that he should be closing them). Soon he's going to be riding his own bike (he's still using pedal cars at the moment) and driving his own car and getting married (ok, maybe that's looking too far ahead).


But the one thing that I have learned is that no matter how frustrating it becomes for a parent to watch his child fumble while he insists on being independent, being patient and reassuring (that you are just there) helps to make them understand the things that they lack. In turn, it builds up trust. And it's important to build up trust between parent and child. And this trust is not as simple as say, keeping a secret kind of trust. This is a trust that builds the bonds between parent and child. It is a thin line between being someone a child looks up to, and someone that a child will avoid from time to time. So look at balance, a balance between being over-protective and neglect. And above all else, show your love to your child. He learns from it and it will reap rewards in your relationship with him. I know ours have.

Next Stop ... Up! | 2007

So now your child can walk. Hurrah! It's a  milestone in his life, and a mark of good parenting on your part, right? For the most part, I would say yes. The question is what role did you play in getting him there? 

I have to admit, I wish I had more time to spend with Jakjak to teach him new stuff. But work and chores get in the way. Still, when you look back on it, you realize that children absorb things like a sponge. They learn from their mistakes (unlike some stubborn adults) and make the necessary adjustments to keep themselves from falling. I have also noticed that their drive to achieve something is far more persistent than an adult. It may look mundane to us the goals that children at this age (one +) want to achieve (get up and walk, reach the glass of water, make a mess, etc.), but then you have to realize that their goals at that point is learning the basics.

So now your child can walk. Now what? Well, to give you a better picture, we have a rather large and empty living room which gives Jakjak loads of room to play and roll and crawl all over. Our bedroom however, is on the 2nd floor some dozen or so steps away. So in the instant that you decide to take a break, he'll notice you're going up the stairs. And he decides to follow. The designated stair-watcher has to be alert when he does this and re-direct his attention to something else. But there came a time when diversion didn't work anymore. So it was like learning how to walk all over again.

Every time Jakjak decides to go on the stairs, you have to be there and wait on him, guide him and clap your hands every step he manages to cleverly take. Believe me, this took a while (and quite a bit of time). Imagine more than five minutes to get up a flight of steps. And that's not yet including the way down. We let him have a go at it because in the end, he will do it anyway. It's either this, or get a lift built into the house.

On some days, after he finally got the hang of it, he would go up half way, call onto us through the railings and give that wonderfully sweet smile of his. We smile back at him with a reminder to be careful, but what he does not see is dad's heart beating twice as fast as normal hoping that he would remember to hold on to the railings and get up or down safely.

Shared Delight | 2007

Changes were expected at the arrival of a child. And there were a lot. There were sleepless nights, soiled diapers and messy houses. Not to mention the stacking bills and shopping expenses. I had then succumbed that it would be a while before we tasted a Mocha Frappuccino again.

One other change was the diet when we went out of the house. Sure, he survived the first year with his ration of baby food. But I found out that babies evolve much faster if you give them organic baby food. No kidding! When Jakjak got his teeth, I thought it should have been in two more months. Not to mention him starting to climb stairs all by himself by now! (this, we had to take drastic action on, seriously)

 And so we were bringing him out more often with us. And that meant always having something good for a one year old to eat. I mean, honestly, I don't think french fries qualify as baby food. As the food hunting went on, Jakjak continued to evolve and decided to start eating most of the same food that we do, as long as he can bite his teeth into them. So his baby diet included pizza, cheese (from a cheeseburger), french fries, donuts and to top it all off, a Mocha Frappuccino!

Surely, at least one of those made his mum very happy. I mean, how could you not say 'no' when Jakjak points to a Mocha Frap at Starbucks?

Walking the Walk | 2007

When you are watching your child grow up, you sometimes grow impatient. Not because you are frustrated that your child cannot do what you want him to do, but rather because you set your expectations too high. Maybe because your friend's cat can play with a ball of yarn at 2 months old, or your neighbor's dog fetching sticks at 3 months old. I believe that every child is special, and that he will shine and surprise you when that time is due.

Then there's the reality that raising one is an awfully big responsibility. In the movies, you see the good stuff. The laughing, the playing, the cute smile and obnoxious farting. But when you're actually there, you see what goes on behind the scenes. What the director of the movie has to put up with. This includes the wailing, the crying, the messy feeding and the stinky diapers. This is where I believe the line is drawn between the men and the boys, not some race to see who is the fastest or who scores the most baskets. What separates the men from the boys, is how you buck up and change soiled diapers (when the baby has diarrhea, no less).

When Jakjak was still a baby, we couldn't wait for him to start crawling. After getting tired of waiting for him to crawl, he walked! The little bugger actually walked! Sure he was clinging to the side of the crib like there's no tomorrow, but he walked! Rather than crawl, he must have figured he would get farther (and faster) if he was walking. And when he was walking, we couldn't wait until he could do it on his own, without the guides, without holding on to mum and dad. When we got tired of waiting, he decided he wanted to ride the baby pram instead! He must have figured out he would get farther (and even faster) in less time and less effort if he was in a pram! He really shines where it matters though, in giving his mum and dad the time of their lives.

Nutty Donuts | 2007

Go Nuts Donuts opened in a mall near our place. The first time we tasted the sweetness of these nutty donuts, we had to traverse Manila's treacherous traffic laden streets. It soon came nearer, and the travel time was cut in half. When it finally opened at a mall just a stone's throw away, we imagined stuffing ourselves with gooey chewy donuts all day! 

That never happened. Because for some reason, the excitement just isn't there anymore when you don't need to battle for your round piece of heaven. Still, Jakjak was as happy as ever munching his way through every sweet bite of black forest donuts. This gave mum and dad an excuse to get some cold frappuccinos (not in any way comparable to Starbucks) along with his pile of sweets.

Thankfully, donuts are not the only reason we go to the mall. After a handful of calories and a dollop of sugar coated flour, we stroll around the mall to burn some of the fats. Also, at the very least, the mall was a place for Jakjak to interact with other people (really, he's just so ... 'political' in nature). We also at least let him spend some time in play areas scattered within the mall. For the most part, it's where we cool off when it gets hot in our house. Think of it as an air conditioned playground. :)