When I was Jakjak | 2007

know I spent a good 5+ years in the care of my grandparents from both sides of the family. My parents were typical hardworking folks that I saw most nights and the weekends. They were like that because they had to, typical of most parents back in the 80s I would say.

Now that I am a parent, I realize the pain and frustration they had to face every day they were away from their kids (at 5 years old, there were only me and my older sister). I feel it, and I know it.

But that was 20 something years ago. Things have changed. I am in a better position now than where my parents were back then. Which makes Jakjak, the luckier one between the two of us.

Whatever it was I may have missed when I was 5, I promised myself that Jakjak would not miss. Looking back at my conversations with my dad not so long ago, that's exactly what he told me. It seems like a cycle of discontent eating away at our outlook in life fueled by past shortcomings. I believe now that it should not be that way. My generation is different from that of my dad. And surely, Jakjak's generation will be different from mine. It is fruitless to hang on and compare the life of the old to the life of the young. If not for nostalgia and lessons learned, it's best to let the past be what it is. Past.

The thing I appreciate and will enforce, is that my dad always wanted us to live good lives. To that extent, I will do my best to give Jakjak and Judy a good life.