Jakjak, Pacifist | 2011

On a personal level, I dislike confrontation. I can argue, I can debate, I can even invoke my rights. But I would rather not fight. Of course that's just me. But if you attack my family whether physically, morally, emotionally or whatever-ally, make no mistake, you are going to hear from me. (this also happens if you mistakenly irk me when I am very very hungry, but that doesn't happen to often)

I guess we, as parents, lead by example. While I prefer not to have a confrontation, I would not stand idly by and be trampled over. The same goes for Jakjak. When somebody tries to pull a one-up on him, I gauge the situation with him. I explain to him why he should (or should not) give up his rights depending on who is on the other end. He knows that he shouldn't take advantage of kids younger than him and girls as well. He knows that he does not have to get physically assertive when he can talk sense to people (surprisingly, this method works best). There are times that I would really have wanted to intervene (and there have been times that I have), but I initially watch Jakjak's reaction to the situation and the other kids' reply to him. 

So far, he had handled difficult situations (difficult for kids anyway) all on his own. He does not start fights, and if somebody harasses him (we're talking kids here), he tells him off. If that does not work, he goes to the kid's mum if she's around or he goes to me. He can get rough while playing, and I understand that, but from my perspective, that has not really led into any big misunderstandings. In fact, when other kids tell him off for being rough, they come to me as well and let me know about it. In turn, I tell Jakjak about it in front of the other kids and he apologizes (most of the time). There was even a time that he told other kids off because a smaller one was being bullied (he told them it was wrong).


And I have to keep reminding myself that he's only five.